Co-Sleeping Resources
When a parent feels like they need to work on sleep it is important they first educate themself on what normal infant sleep looks like. Unfortunately many ''authorities'' get it wrong. While at it one might as well research the harmful effects of cry-it-out methods. After one does that I find a 3 step model works best to helping better a sleep situation.
1. Find a way to get balance. This often means finding a way to get in a parent-nap, assessing for breastfeeding complications such as pain, getting adequate nutrition (particularly snacks and water on top of meals), and reducing stressors.
2. Improve quality of relationship with child. This often means undivided attention and working on other potential issues (such as hitting mum). Many moms find it useful to set a timer for 15-30 minutes while they engage in uninterrupted child-led play.
3. Work on sleep solutions. I'll list several below.
Bedtime Routine
A consistent, multi-faceted bedtime routine has been linked to helping babies sleep at night. So choose a bedtime routine that has multiple steps and be consistent with it. Repeat the routine each time baby wakes and most parents will see results in a couple of weeks. Don't expect a perfectly sleeping baby, just improvement.
Bedshare
Researchers report that mothers who bedshare say they sleep better at night. Although there may be more night wakings when bedsharing, babies tend to be awake for shorter periods of time and during that time parents typically half-wake or sleep through a breastfeeding. Babies who bedshare often tend to cry less at night.
“Pantley Pull-Off”
When your baby falls asleep while nursing, stick your finger inside your baby's mouth and gently remove your nipple. Baby may root for a second and then fall back asleep so give it a second; if it does not work out and baby is still rooting, replace the nipple and try again when baby next falls asleep. With practice, you can learn to sneak away as baby sleeps.
Foods for Sleep
This applies to babies who have started solid foods already; this is not an endorsement or recommendation for early introduction of solids. There are some foods that are beneficial for sleep and some that are not. Foods that are not beneficial, such as caffeine, should be avoided by breastfeeding mothers as well. Alcohol in mums diet, sugar, citrus can sometimes cause wakefulness. Foods that help sleep include chamomile tea, bananas, oatmeal, almonds, turkey, whole-wheat bread. Those with food intolerances can also suffer from poor sleep. Dairy and gluten sensitivities are most common and often unknown to parents.
The Heavy Wagon
Babies and children who are active and exposed to nature during the day tend to sleep better at night. If you have a moving baby or toddler, have them pull a wagon filled with heavy objects before bed. If you don't have a mover yet or this doesn't appeal to you, make sure they get both mental and physical stimulation before bedtime. Follow their cues and don't force it, but gentle encouragement can work wonders. If you notice your baby is working on a particular milestone, games that center on that milestone would be a great choice, providing both physical and mental stimulation. Just as we adults have busy heads that keep us up at night so do toddlers and babes. Helping them work those things out during the day can lead to more restful sleep.
Sensory Improvement
Babes can be influenced by many types of sensory stimulation. Assessing a child for reflux and ear aches are two medical possibilities. Reflux can be dealt with using inclined sleeping positions. Some babes need warmer or cooler temperatures. Others need a firmer mattress or different night wear. Some need more noise such as a fan turned against the wall or a baby monitor set up in reverse. Some need less noise such as television sets turned off. If a parent feels they have tried all sleep methods it may be worth looking at a sensory integration disorder checklist. Some children are hyper or hypo sensitive in specific areas that once identified can lead to changes thar will affect sleep.
Time Outdoors
Our circadian rhythms, that physiologically guide our sleep cycles, benefit from outdoor exposure on a daily basis. This includes rainy dull weather. If one simply can't get out a temporary solution is play in front of an open window.
Undivided Attention
Sometimes babes need more undivided attention and seek it out at night. It is really easy to continually multi-task. Set a timer for 30 minutes and give babe undivided attention, let them lead the play.
Sleep Begets Sleep
A good nap can make bedtime much easier. Contrary to some public opinion babes do not sleep better when their nap is missed.
Change Your Mommy Mantra
When your child wants to nurse what goes through your head? If it is not positive then you may want to try actively replacing it with something else. Our runnigncommentary has a huge affect on how we parent.
Safe Surroundings
Children of all ages sleep better when they feel safe, happy, and have little anxiety. Life can be a struggle sometimes and in being one we may unknowingly create an environment that stresses our child. Some common triggers of this stress are: marital issues, smoking inside the home, drug or excessive alcohol use in the home, a noisy environment or ''high volume'' household. If any of these sound familiar you may want to consider finding a way to change that behavior. Additionally children who do jot have their needs met will often sleep worse. We often do not realize that leaving a babe to cry, using spanking as a tool for punishment, sending our child to bed without supper, not having enough time to play, being put in time-out before bed instead of hugged, etc.. May leave our child with unmet needs that impact sleep. Sometimes stress comes from outside the home such as from a daycare or school worker or peer. The less stress in a child's environment, the more their needs are met, and the more they feel safe the better they will sleep. We all have room to grow, there is no shame in making change.
Transitions
Some children are particularly sensitive to transitions. We can help them by making our transition known ahead of time and going about it gradually. Maybe mom will sing a night time song and then tuen volume down and lights down around the house before starting night routine. When babe wakes mom can resing the song. Just like in Elimination Communication parents can use specific transition sounds to help a child understand a transition is taking place. Many children respond very positively to this.
Lovey
Some children benefit from introduction of a lovey. A lovey is a security object such as a doll or blanket that a child attaches to. It helps if mom can wear this in her bra every once in awhile so it has her smell. Then a parent will bring out the lovey during positive experiences such as nursing or play time until the child attaches to it. A chils then may wake and cuddle their lovey instead of always needing extea night parenting.
Deep Breathing
Breathing deep, meditation, child yoga, guided imagery can all help us become calm and ready for bed. Deep breathing is the start. It is part of the human condition, much like a yawn, where if one person takes a deep breathe then others follow. So breathe deep around your child. To teach this skill you may even have your child blow out a candle.
Alternative Therapy
Many many children and babes benefit from alternative therapies. The most common probably being chiropractic care. Ive heard countless stories of sleep coming from a chiropractic appointment. Others may include: cranial sacral therapy, aromatherapy, homeopathica, and massage.
Play It Out
Some parents choose to actively discuss sleep during waking hours, playing out the theme with puppets or dolls to help it become more normalized and accepted.
The Downs
Sometimes a babe simply needs help getting down to sleep. It is okay to breastfeed a baby until they sleep. Research shows it is not spoiling or problematic. In fact quite the opposite. Many moms find a birthing/yoga ball helps to bounce a baby down. Others find their babe needs walked down. Some do this by pushing a stroller arounf the house and others use baby carriers such as wraps and slings. A traditional American method is to rock a bay down in a rocking chair. These can still be effective as a babe reaches older ages.
Play Groups
Join a play group. It'll help recharge you by giving needed mental and social stimulation. It'll help your child exert energy through play. The group should have parents who encourage you to understand normal gentle sleep and not ones who pressure sleep training or make you feel worse about your situation.
1. Find a way to get balance. This often means finding a way to get in a parent-nap, assessing for breastfeeding complications such as pain, getting adequate nutrition (particularly snacks and water on top of meals), and reducing stressors.
2. Improve quality of relationship with child. This often means undivided attention and working on other potential issues (such as hitting mum). Many moms find it useful to set a timer for 15-30 minutes while they engage in uninterrupted child-led play.
3. Work on sleep solutions. I'll list several below.
Bedtime Routine
A consistent, multi-faceted bedtime routine has been linked to helping babies sleep at night. So choose a bedtime routine that has multiple steps and be consistent with it. Repeat the routine each time baby wakes and most parents will see results in a couple of weeks. Don't expect a perfectly sleeping baby, just improvement.
Bedshare
Researchers report that mothers who bedshare say they sleep better at night. Although there may be more night wakings when bedsharing, babies tend to be awake for shorter periods of time and during that time parents typically half-wake or sleep through a breastfeeding. Babies who bedshare often tend to cry less at night.
“Pantley Pull-Off”
When your baby falls asleep while nursing, stick your finger inside your baby's mouth and gently remove your nipple. Baby may root for a second and then fall back asleep so give it a second; if it does not work out and baby is still rooting, replace the nipple and try again when baby next falls asleep. With practice, you can learn to sneak away as baby sleeps.
Foods for Sleep
This applies to babies who have started solid foods already; this is not an endorsement or recommendation for early introduction of solids. There are some foods that are beneficial for sleep and some that are not. Foods that are not beneficial, such as caffeine, should be avoided by breastfeeding mothers as well. Alcohol in mums diet, sugar, citrus can sometimes cause wakefulness. Foods that help sleep include chamomile tea, bananas, oatmeal, almonds, turkey, whole-wheat bread. Those with food intolerances can also suffer from poor sleep. Dairy and gluten sensitivities are most common and often unknown to parents.
The Heavy Wagon
Babies and children who are active and exposed to nature during the day tend to sleep better at night. If you have a moving baby or toddler, have them pull a wagon filled with heavy objects before bed. If you don't have a mover yet or this doesn't appeal to you, make sure they get both mental and physical stimulation before bedtime. Follow their cues and don't force it, but gentle encouragement can work wonders. If you notice your baby is working on a particular milestone, games that center on that milestone would be a great choice, providing both physical and mental stimulation. Just as we adults have busy heads that keep us up at night so do toddlers and babes. Helping them work those things out during the day can lead to more restful sleep.
Sensory Improvement
Babes can be influenced by many types of sensory stimulation. Assessing a child for reflux and ear aches are two medical possibilities. Reflux can be dealt with using inclined sleeping positions. Some babes need warmer or cooler temperatures. Others need a firmer mattress or different night wear. Some need more noise such as a fan turned against the wall or a baby monitor set up in reverse. Some need less noise such as television sets turned off. If a parent feels they have tried all sleep methods it may be worth looking at a sensory integration disorder checklist. Some children are hyper or hypo sensitive in specific areas that once identified can lead to changes thar will affect sleep.
Time Outdoors
Our circadian rhythms, that physiologically guide our sleep cycles, benefit from outdoor exposure on a daily basis. This includes rainy dull weather. If one simply can't get out a temporary solution is play in front of an open window.
Undivided Attention
Sometimes babes need more undivided attention and seek it out at night. It is really easy to continually multi-task. Set a timer for 30 minutes and give babe undivided attention, let them lead the play.
Sleep Begets Sleep
A good nap can make bedtime much easier. Contrary to some public opinion babes do not sleep better when their nap is missed.
Change Your Mommy Mantra
When your child wants to nurse what goes through your head? If it is not positive then you may want to try actively replacing it with something else. Our runnigncommentary has a huge affect on how we parent.
Safe Surroundings
Children of all ages sleep better when they feel safe, happy, and have little anxiety. Life can be a struggle sometimes and in being one we may unknowingly create an environment that stresses our child. Some common triggers of this stress are: marital issues, smoking inside the home, drug or excessive alcohol use in the home, a noisy environment or ''high volume'' household. If any of these sound familiar you may want to consider finding a way to change that behavior. Additionally children who do jot have their needs met will often sleep worse. We often do not realize that leaving a babe to cry, using spanking as a tool for punishment, sending our child to bed without supper, not having enough time to play, being put in time-out before bed instead of hugged, etc.. May leave our child with unmet needs that impact sleep. Sometimes stress comes from outside the home such as from a daycare or school worker or peer. The less stress in a child's environment, the more their needs are met, and the more they feel safe the better they will sleep. We all have room to grow, there is no shame in making change.
Transitions
Some children are particularly sensitive to transitions. We can help them by making our transition known ahead of time and going about it gradually. Maybe mom will sing a night time song and then tuen volume down and lights down around the house before starting night routine. When babe wakes mom can resing the song. Just like in Elimination Communication parents can use specific transition sounds to help a child understand a transition is taking place. Many children respond very positively to this.
Lovey
Some children benefit from introduction of a lovey. A lovey is a security object such as a doll or blanket that a child attaches to. It helps if mom can wear this in her bra every once in awhile so it has her smell. Then a parent will bring out the lovey during positive experiences such as nursing or play time until the child attaches to it. A chils then may wake and cuddle their lovey instead of always needing extea night parenting.
Deep Breathing
Breathing deep, meditation, child yoga, guided imagery can all help us become calm and ready for bed. Deep breathing is the start. It is part of the human condition, much like a yawn, where if one person takes a deep breathe then others follow. So breathe deep around your child. To teach this skill you may even have your child blow out a candle.
Alternative Therapy
Many many children and babes benefit from alternative therapies. The most common probably being chiropractic care. Ive heard countless stories of sleep coming from a chiropractic appointment. Others may include: cranial sacral therapy, aromatherapy, homeopathica, and massage.
Play It Out
Some parents choose to actively discuss sleep during waking hours, playing out the theme with puppets or dolls to help it become more normalized and accepted.
The Downs
Sometimes a babe simply needs help getting down to sleep. It is okay to breastfeed a baby until they sleep. Research shows it is not spoiling or problematic. In fact quite the opposite. Many moms find a birthing/yoga ball helps to bounce a baby down. Others find their babe needs walked down. Some do this by pushing a stroller arounf the house and others use baby carriers such as wraps and slings. A traditional American method is to rock a bay down in a rocking chair. These can still be effective as a babe reaches older ages.
Play Groups
Join a play group. It'll help recharge you by giving needed mental and social stimulation. It'll help your child exert energy through play. The group should have parents who encourage you to understand normal gentle sleep and not ones who pressure sleep training or make you feel worse about your situation.
For More Information
Books
No Cry Sleep Solution
Nighttime Parenting and The Sleep book by Dr Sears
Sleeping with Your Baby by James Mckenna
Sweet Dreams: A Pediatrician's Secrets for a Baby's Good Night's Sleep
Online
Dr. Sears List of Sleep Tips
Pillow Talk: Helping Your Baby Get a Good Night's Sleep
Gentle Sleep Solutions
Replace Your Mommy Mantra
Sleep Freedom. Letting Kids Find Their Own Sleep Pattern
Sleep Experts? Not in my Nursery. How I learned to accept my baby's sleep schedule.
The No CIO Sleep Solution That Works (In My House)
Research Shows CoSleeping Mamas Get More Sleep
Bedtime Yoga for Kids
11 Ways to Beat New Mom Fatigue
Gentle Sleep Solutions
Nutrition Tips for Sleep
No Cry Sleep Solution
Nighttime Parenting and The Sleep book by Dr Sears
Sleeping with Your Baby by James Mckenna
Sweet Dreams: A Pediatrician's Secrets for a Baby's Good Night's Sleep
Online
Dr. Sears List of Sleep Tips
Pillow Talk: Helping Your Baby Get a Good Night's Sleep
Gentle Sleep Solutions
Replace Your Mommy Mantra
Sleep Freedom. Letting Kids Find Their Own Sleep Pattern
Sleep Experts? Not in my Nursery. How I learned to accept my baby's sleep schedule.
The No CIO Sleep Solution That Works (In My House)
Research Shows CoSleeping Mamas Get More Sleep
Bedtime Yoga for Kids
11 Ways to Beat New Mom Fatigue
Gentle Sleep Solutions
Nutrition Tips for Sleep
The above information has been borrowed from: